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Principles for a Harmonious Marriage

April 28, 2015 by Radhanath Swami Leave a Comment

Across all religions there is a universal concept that when a man and woman marry with proper attitude they become one body. They don’t merge into each other’s existence, but it means that they start living for a common purpose – to serve God together.

They share the same goal at many levels. First – I will do anything to protect you and you will do anything to protect me; this is oneness. We are there for each other and whatever the difficulties we may face, we will be faithful to each other, till death separates us. It means to give up one’s false ego for the sake of the other. It’s a two way street. So this faithfulness, this devotion to each other is the common principle of marriage.

Secondly, we will tolerate any differences between us for the sake of giving the children the best possible upbringing. I may be angry as fire on you and you may be totally disgusted with me, but if the children are there, we will not express our anger. If they see their parents don’t like each other it will affect their consciousness negatively. They will feel insecure and suffer internally. They may not understand intellectually what that suffering is, but it’s going to go deep within their psyche, and it will mold their consciousness for the rest of their lives. Even when they grow to the age of their parents, they will have certain insecurities, within their consciousness because of how their parents behaved. Whether it’s a fight or a cold war, children can feel the vibrations and its affects them within. So in a marriage we have to give up our egos and our preferences because we share one principle – the welfare of our children. And all this becomes transcendental when it is done in the service of God. Because the children are God’s children and our bodies are God’s bodies so we should not misuse them. Marriage is a divine relationship because we are responsible to God on behalf of each other. This is oneness.

Srila Prabhupada explains that when a husband and wife live together congenially with austerities and with God as the center of their lives – with service to God, service to their children, service to the society, and service to each other in connection to devotion to God; God lives in that house, not figuratively but in a very real sense. Between the husband and wife one person is sufficient to execute devotional service because both of them will enjoy the results because of their good relationship. Therefore, if the wife is unable to execute devotional service, the husband should carefully do so and the faithful wife will share the result, or vice versa. The relationship between husband and wife is firmly established when the wife is faithful and the husband is sincere. Then there is oneness because they are sharing their lives with a sense of responsibility. Whatever one person is doing the other is getting the spiritual credit for it.

In a marriage God works through your partner to give you what you lack. And if both parties are sincere, dedicated and understand the above mentioned principle then they will help each other to go back to the kingdom of God, keeping God in the center of their lives.

Source: http://www.radhanathswami.com/2012/06/principles-for-a-harmonious-marriage/

Filed Under: Tips/Techniques

About Radhanath Swami

Radhanath Swami is a Vaishnava sanyassin (a monk in a Krishna-bhakti lineage) and teacher of the devotional path of Bhakti-yoga. He is author of The Journey Home, a memoir of his search for spiritual truth. His teachings draw from the sacred texts of India such as The Bhagavad-gita, Srimad Bhagavatam, and Ramayana, and aim to reveal the practical application of the sacred traditions, while focusing on the shared essence which unites apparently disparate religious or spiritual paths.

Born Richard Slavin, on December 7, 1950, in his teens he came to confront a deep sense of alienation from suburban Chicago life and the civil injustices of mid-century America. At the age of nineteen, while on a summer trip to Europe, his internal struggles culminated in a commitment to search for God wherever it might lead him. Meditating on the Isle of Crete, he felt a supernatural calling and the next morning set off alone to find spiritual India. The Journey Home documents his odyssey as a penniless hitch-hiker though Greece, Turkey, Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan and finally India. There he lived as a wandering ascetic, first amongst the forest dwelling Himalayan yogis and later amongst a wide variety of gurus and spiritual practitioners throughout India and Nepal. Ultimately, he was led to the holy town of Vrindavan, where he found his path amongst the Bhakti-yogis.

In Vrindavan he found the teacher he was searching for in A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada (1896-1977) the founder of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKCON), and representative of Gaudiya Vaishnavism, (the Krishna-bhakti tradition stemming from the 16th century mystic avatar Sri Chaitanya). In choosing Bhaktivedanta Swami, as his guru, Radhanath Swami felt compelled to shear his matted locks and reenter Western society with a mission to share the sacred wisdom he had received. This return exemplifies the form of devotional yoga which is at the heart of Radhanath Swami’s teachings, a spiritual practice expressed as tangible action meant to bring about personal fulfillment and benefit the world.

At the the age of 31 he took the monastic vows of a Vaishnava sanyassin and became known as Radhanath Swami.

Today Radhanath Swami travels regularly throughout India, Europe and North America, sharing the teachings of Bhakti-yoga. He resides much of the year at the Radha Gopinath Ashram in Chowpatty, Mumbai. For the past twenty-five years he has guided the community’s development and has directed a number of acclaimed social action projects including Midday Meals, which daily serves more than 260,000 plates of sanctified vegetarian food to the children of the slums of Mumbai. He has also worked to establish missionary hospitals and eye camps, eco-friendly farms, schools and ashrams, an orphanage, and a number of emergency relief programs throughout India.

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Healthy Marriages. Happy Families. Strong ISKCON.

The GVT is a grass roots volunteer group of Krishna devotees who are mostly mental health or educational professionals. Our intention is to provide resources to support married couples and prospective couples primarily in North American ISKCON communities. However, the broader community of Vaishnavas, and anyone who is interested in spiritual married life are welcome to take advantage of the knowledge that is shared here. We want to help spiritualize your married life so that it will be an asset for your Krishna (God) consciousness. We welcome your suggestions to make this site relevant and useful.

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